Dear Rylee,
Why do people make such a big deal out of Mother’s Day? I haven’t celebrated it since my mother kicked me out of the house when I was 16, but now that I have a daughter of my own my husband keeps asking me what we are going to do on Mother’s Day? We have been getting in huge fights because he doesn’t seem to understand that I don’t want to celebrate it! What do I do?
Desperate for HELP!

Dear Desperate for HELP!

Life is about compromise. It’s hard to admit, but it is true. You need to sit down and explain to your husband, step by step, why you do not like celebrating mother’s day, and then you need to get over it. Harsh, I know, but it is true.

Mother’s Day is a tremendous holiday where you are the star.

To you it may seem like you are the only one losing out on this holiday, but you are depriving your child of learning what it means to put someone else above herself.

Whether your daughter is 1 year old or 99 years old, she will understand that Mother’s Day is a day to cherish, not only with you but also with the children she will one day have.

Stop and think why you truly do not want to celebrate Mother’s Day.

It could be because your own relationship with your mother is shattered and you are afraid that your daughter and you will become the same way.

You could still be harboring resentment for what your mom did to you, but you have an advantage.

There is an old proverb that states, “A wise man learns from the mistakes of others, while a fool learns from his own mistakes.”

You have the opportunity to learn from your mother’s mistakes.

You can take everything you dislike about your mother’s child-rearing skills and make sure that you avoid them when raising your own child.

However, with all that said, I still encourage you to analyze everything your mother taught you in life and decide what it is that your mother was doing right and wrong.

Sometimes to a daughter or a son, it may seem like some of the things a parent does is mean and spiteful but most of the times it was the only way they knew how to raise a child.

Try forgiving, you don’t have to tell her you forgive her but the path to healing is paved with forgiveness and it might just help you with your relationship with your daughter if you don’t always have such animosity for your mother hanging over your shoulder.

All the best of luck and Happy Mother’s Day!

RYLEE!

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